bursting

life hasn't been so glamorous at our house this week.  I came down with the flu on Monday morning.  It hit me quickly and with great force.  For the first time since Mack was born I felt like I couldn't take care of him on my own.  I have realized many times how much he relies on me for but this was the first time that I didn't know if I could give him all that he needed.  I have been super fortunate in my life and have not been really sick too much.  But the few times that I have always cause me to find a deeper sense of gratitude for my day to day monotonous activities.  I would love to be able to get out of this bed and sweep the floor, make dinner, change a diaper or fold some laundry.  It is truly humbling to realize how each breath is a gift and something to be grateful for.

As my body feels like it breaking and withering trying to fight this bug my heart is bursting as I listen my little one in the other room.  My house if filled with the most beautiful sounds of my sweet Sam caring and playing with his son.  I usually am right next to them enjoying the fun but lately I just get to listen and it's music to my ears.  My heart has been bursting alot lately.  Sometimes I wonder how it still works because multiple times throughout a day I feel it burst a little more as I watch and care for Mack. He is constantly causing me joy through his sounds, his actions, the things he is learning, facials, body language, fear of the vacuum, testing the boundaries, etc. etc.  Even though I have sacrificed so much becoming a mother and most of the things I will never get to fully enjoy again I feel like I have experienced more joy in the last 8 months than I ever have.  It's truly a testament that you love those that you serve.  Mack and Sam are my everything, I just hope my heart can handle all the joy the constantly bring me.

what works best?

I've been trying to decide what to do with this blog, I know that this blog is a good link to our current blog, should I update on here when I've posted something new on the new blog?  Should I make this one private?  Who reads? who cares?  Share an opinion if you have one.  

... I updated the new blog today too.  

new blog

I caved and finally started a new blog after reaching my photo limit on this one.  

Come follow us at here

belated halloween

halloween happened our house despite the delay to post about it 

i loved having a baby for halloween.  

even though it's a little tricky squishing everything into one day it was worth it 

we visited both grandparents, my grandma, the office and a cousins school parade 

here's the holiday through pictures

he grows too fast!

2 weeks 

4 and a half months

We had Mack's 4 month checkup last week 

15 pounds 5 ounces- 70% for weight

20something... i'm a bad mom and forgot 95% for height

tall, skinny and big headed just like his dad.

pumpkin patch

Last year we went the pumpkin patch for our first time
loving it we knew we had to go this year.
it was a great day there, we found some cute pumpkins for our front porch
if you've never been you should go.

my favorite boys

loving the wheelbarrow

to the cabin

it's a family tradition to head to the cabin in woodland for conference weekend 

usually we are running up in between sessions on Saturday and then hurrying down on Sunday

this year was so nice, we went up Friday afternoon and stayed until after dinner Sunday

no rushing involved!

.... I love not working full time.

this was Mack's first time at the cabin

it was beautiful up there

even though it was a bit chilly

it was such a nice weekend away, thanks for having us 

playing go fish with the cousins.... we missed abby, sarah, eliza, annie, calvin and peter!

swinging with grandpa

provo river

tummy time by the fire

checking out the fire

snuggling with amy

just being cute

chilling on my couch outside

one of those moments

Sometimes being a mom is so easy.  The day just flows by without too many bumps and when the bumps come I somehow handle them perfectly, making the day that much better.  But then there are those days that it seems so hard!  It feels like Mack won't stop crying, or won't sleep longer than 30 minutes and won't be happy.  It feels like the day goes on and on so slowly.  Yesterday was one of those days.  After Mack fell asleep in the car for 20 minutes he woke up once we came inside and wouldn't go back to sleep, but he wouldn't be happy either.  So I tried to distract him for the next hour until he'd eat again hoping he'd sleep soon after that.  Long story short after trying for 3 hours to nap he finally fell asleep.  **sigh** I just felt so relieved that he was finally napping.  I went to the kitchen to start dinner and make the banana bread I couldn't wait to try and clicked on my phone to see if I had missed anything, here's what I saw.  

my heart melted

I love my sweet little babe even in the middle of one of those moments

utah game

we were feeling a little adventurous last week and took Mack to his first football game

of course we were so nervous of how he would respond to all the noise 

and to our great surprise he did great!

he was so into all the people and action 

we were super lucky and sat right on the front row 

he loved watching the Utah red jersey's walking around right in front of him 

we stood for most of the first half and he just sucked on our fingers as we jumped and screamed

he screamed at the band and dancers during half time 

and snoozed during the the third and part of the fourth quarter

we got home and he went straight to bed and then slept for most of the next day, recovering

4 MONTHS

can't believe our little guy is 4 months this week 

you hear people say this all the time.... but i can't remember life without him

he has been the best thing that has ever happened to us

he brings us so much joy and happiness

i feel so lucky to be his mom

he loves chattering away

he is the biggest flirt and smiles at every girl who stops to talk to him

his favorite toy is his binky, it loves pulling it out and trying to get it back in

he is super strong and always wants to be standing on his feet 

when he lays on the floor he kicks and rolls in circles

he is sleeping 7 hours consistently through the night, he wakes up to eat and sleeps a few more

he is getting good at putting himself to sleep, and usually wakes up chattering to himself

of course our life isn't all glam over here

we have hard moments too but I like to think the good strongly outweighs the bad

a little extreme

Many of you know that I have dipped my feet into the couponing world 

I feel like if I am going to buy something anyways I should try to buy it when it's on sale

and yes that means a lot of the time I don't need it right then but I will use it 

for instance... 

this week there is a deal on tide detergent, which is my favorite 

but boy it's expensive and doesn't go on sale often

so when it does I like to stock up

we stopped our paper awhile ago because once the baby came my couponing went on the back burner

so I don't have the extra coupon to get the extra $$ off but I read on pinterest that you can buy them on ebay

so I found the coupon I need on ebay but here's the catch I would buy a stack of 20 

which means I would be buying 60 tide detergents!! yes 60!

that's a little extreme for us right now but I'm just throwing it out there, 

DOES ANYONE ELSE LOVE TIDE AND A GOOD DEAL. 

LET ME KNOW IF YOU ARE INTERESTED IN SHARING THEM WITH ME FOR $4.32 A PIECE.... THEY ARE NORMALLY $6.00.... OBVIOUSLY THIS IS THE SMALLER SIZE

the deal ends this Wednesday, one week from today

tough boys

we sat right behind the Utah players bench at the opening game 

it was so entertaining watching the players, game

this player was especially entertaining his tat says

'cherish family'

hah funny.  

thank you bumbo

we first put MC in his bumbo about a month ago

he loved it 

he seems to love sitting and watching what's going on as compared to being carried

after he eats he typically has some floor time

he's pretty good at entertaining himself watching me or eating his fists

as long as I keep talking to him he is content for 20 minutes ish

after that we do a little tummy time and I sit and play with him 

then he is starting to get tired so I put him in his bumbo and he'll sit next to me wherever I am 

he will sit about another 20-30 minutes before getting bored 

it's great, I just set him on the counter and chop everything for dinner

or on the floor while I get ready 

it's so much easier to do these things with him sitting next to me instead of wearing him 

I love his curled little toes

yesterday I looked over and he had fallen asleep about 30 seconds after I gave him his binky...

I wish it was that easy all the time.

*** don't worry I am aware of the recent recall on bumbos and I don't leave him sitting alone.  I always stay within arms reach just in case his head topples over.  

grateful

my brother (inlaw) but I like him so much he is just my brother is so talented and thoughtful

he started a non-profit organization for a close friend(his wife helped a lot too)

I was so touched by the stories shared on their website

here's the youtube video

to read more stories and to help support babies in need visit 

liftinglila.org

keep your kleenex box close by because you will need it 

your heart will be softened and you will fall in love with each family 

you will be amazed by their strength, dedication and continually ability to deal 

with what I think would be one of the most challenging of trails

gone to work

Mack is 3 months today!
time has just flown by
how is it that the last month of pregnancy lasted a year and three months lasted a day?

today is my first day back at work.
i'm just working two days a week and feel super lucky that my job is so flexible
I found an awesome babysitter for Mack.... his dad!
even though I would much rather be home with my boys it was so easy leaving him with Sam
plus I feel like this is an experience that Sam will never get with another child
it's unique and I think so special

it was really weird walking into work today
nothing has changed, it smells exactly the same, everyone looks the same
it seems like yesterday I was here
I can't believe how fast all my responsibilities came back and how second nature they seem
and I love that I don't have to come back tomorrow!

gramps turns 96

over the weekend we celebrated my gramdpa peterson's 96 birthday!

you read that right, NINETY-SIX!

can you imagine all that he has witnessed in his life 

he is your typical jolly happy 'little' grandpa

of course he has the best stories(still has a great memory), he is lovable, kind, and so giving 

I remember bragging as a child that my grandpa gave me a 100 dollars for every birthday and christmas

he has lived the last 10 years or so alone 

he cared for my grandma until the day she passed and he misses her so much 

the day was special

he talked about the wonderful family we were and how proud he was to have us all 

he talked about how happy my grandma must be watching the family grow and all the little ones 

he did a little jig as we sang happy birthday to him 

he gave us all 10 dollars because he thought we were perfect 10's in his eyes

and of course he was wearing a bright colorful shirt

last year we bought 95 balloons and individually staked them in the front yard 

right after we finished... before a picture could even be taking they are started to pop 

after about 2 minutes we literally only had about 20 balloons left 

this year we went a little more simple and all the great-grandkids helped make a banner

 mack dressed up for the occassion and wore a tie

 some of the kiddos with the banner

 mrs. bakers tasty cake

 such a cutie

 he blew them all out

remembering

I remember the day Sam set up our crib

our room wasn't painted... in fact it was a mess 

since we had moved into our house we knew the room was going to be a nursery 

but it became the, 'just put in the babies room' room 

it was filled with lots of random things needing to find new homes

once we bought our crib we started to get motivated to clean it out and make it a special space

I remember waking up the next morning and walking out of our bedroom and seeing the crib

chills shivered up my legs and into my spine as the realization hit me

that crib was for my little baby growing readily inside of me 

of course excitement filled me up as I pictured myself going to fetch my little one over and over again

thanks to a wonderful support system, friends and family that room transformed 

it soon filled with diapers, wipes, bath gear, blankets, books, clothes etc. etc. 

and now all those things I envisioned and dreamt about are coming true.  

that room has become Mack's room and it's arguable my favorite room in the house

I love hearing him talk in his crib as he patiently waits for me to come and get him

yesterday Mack slept until 830, I woke up before that and went to take a peak at my sleeping little one

I found this little sweet one peacefully sleeping away. 

new trick

ignore our new parent enthusiasm.  

birth announcement

I was so excited with how great Mack's announcements turned out 

here are the 2 that we sent out to family and close friends

I found a great etsy shop that designed the announcement 

I especially liked her because she is from Utah(gotta support the locals)

then I printed them for cheap at costco(since everyone will throw it away)

and since I loved them so much it was motivating to get them in the mail

lazy day

Today was a lazy day.

it's very rare that I get to have one and I must admit I really enjoyed it.

Mack and I spent lots of time snuggling together

I didn't worry about the laundry, cleaning, cooking or any other projects 

I didn't have anywhere I had to be

I just enjoyed the day.

why is it so hard to enjoy and live in the moment? 

maybe it's just me, but my mind is constantly a step ahead

'once Mack is asleep I'm going to .....' shower, eat, clean this, sew that etc. 

but today once Mack was asleep I just held him and didn't worry about the other stuff 

you wouldn't be able to do this everyday, nothing would ever get done 

but today I was okay with it and looking back on my day, you'd think I would feel dissatisfied or unaccomplished but I actually feel such great joy. 

after doing nothing all day we topped it off with sitting around the pool enjoying the night.

Mack took his first ride in a truck